February 7th, 2020
It is easy to appreciate nature while sitting on the beach, watching the sunrise and set, but it’s just as easy to resent that same beach in the time of a hurricane or tsunami. There’s good and bad to everything, and the same remains true in nature. Despite loving nature my entire life, I remember a few days last year that I was so frustrated with the weather that I could almost scream at Mother Nature. The days of my Commemorative and Commencement speeches. Those were the two days where I was begging, pleading and crying for the clouds to clear up, so that I could deliver my speeches in clear weather. I knew that the weather wasn’t under my control, yet every ten minutes to see if by some off-chance, the rain would halt in its path. But alas, Mother Nature stood her ground. 100% chance of rain on both days. I still remember the night before commemorative, when I decided to go to bed at 10:00, seeing lightning flags outside, and the ground-shaking thunder that followed. It woke me up once again at around 3:25 am. It was strange seeing lightning and thunder, but not hearing the raindrops fall against my window. After a while, I finally started hearing the pitter-patter outside, and forced myself to go to sleep. “You are a failure in your life. You and a trash can are worth the same.” I jolted awake; this wasn’t just a bad dream, but also a horrible memory from seventh grade. The time was now 5 am, and I couldn’t get myself back to sleep. From first grade, all the way until eighth, these were the words I couldn’t shake. I heard these words so much, that I almost started believing them. Only a few people believed me and in my dreams and my success. I was not able to sleep anymore because all I was thinking are the words from my history teacher. “Am I a failure in my life?”
Tin-tini-tini. My alarm started beeping, and I finally jumped out of my bed and opened the weather app on my phone to check the rain status. The chance of rain went from 100% to 40%, that gave me a super positive start to the day. I started getting ready for the awards function. I knew my name was in the nominations, but I didn’t know if I was going to get the award. I wore a blue shirt with white khaki pants. I was trying to tie my necktie, but I didn’t know how.
“Dad, I need some help with the tie,”
He started tying the tie. “Dad, I hope I get this award today. Mom, do you think I will get the award?” I said,
“Be confident and text us after the awards function,” my mom replied.
I gave them a smile and ran to the bus stop to catch the bus. I reached the bus stop early, and I was looking at those tiny little raindrops, sliding down the door. I was still praying for clear skies, and although it was cloudy, I had a small hope that it would not rain on both of those days. After some time I reached school and started walking around, but three things were running through my mind: the desperation for sunny skies on commencement days, the fear that I’ll never reach my dreams, and the pain of leaving Naperville North. After wandering aimlessly for about fifteen minutes, I went to the cafeteria and sat down. There were two freshmen signing each other’s yearbooks, talking about the design on the cover. I heard their whole conversation about the yearbook, but I was trying not to look at them, and the best part was they didn’t know that I was the Managing Editor for that book. It gave me some kind of high listening to their conversation. I walked towards the athletic entrance of the school to meet all the other seniors. We all started taking pictures and began talking about the weather. It wasn’t just me, the whole class of 2019 was praying for no rain on commencement day. Naperville North always had a tradition of celebrating commencement outside, unless the weather is too bad. We all wanted our commencement to be outside, so all of our families can come and enjoy.
I wanted to take a picture of the stage, so I went inside to our awards function to take pictures before everyone came in. As I was walking in, I saw my mom and dad, that was the best surprise from NNHS because I didn’t expect them to be there. It was really the best day of my life already after seeing my parents in the awards function. Maybe the best days are always the unplanned ones. The suspense still continued because my parents didn’t know what award I was getting. I went back to the athletic entrance and we were waiting for teachers to send us inside. We have five more minutes to go inside and I started thinking about the first time I entered this place. In 2014, I entered NNHS for the first time from the Athletic entrance, and I would be leaving from the same entrance on commencement day. I came here as zero and I had no idea about anything, I was leaving as the top ten percent of the 2019 graduating class and with the confidence of winning hearts inside this school. Naperville north isn’t just a regular school for me, it is the holiest place on the planet.
As the national anthem began, we started walking into the awards ceremony. They started announcing the award winners, every year they announce fourteen awards and nine of them are already over, I still didn’t get any award. The tension has begun now, the choir group started giving their performance but my focus is on the words my history teacher said all those years ago. “You will be a failure in everything.” I was unable to focus, when they started announcing the next award My name was in the nominations for Media award and everyone is waiting for the result. “This year’s winner is Krishna Bavana.” I was hearing a lot of cheering and that gave me goosebumps. I don’t remember anything except whispering to myself, “I am not a failure.”
I went back home and slept for a few hours. I wore the graduation gown for the first time and started getting ready to leave my home. As I was walking outside, it wasn’t raining but it was extremely cold. After reaching school, I dropped all my stuff in the field house and started walking towards the auditorium, where the senior class was supposed to meet. There were three commemorative speakers excluding the opener and closure, and there were some teacher speeches and performances from show choir kids. We were getting ready to walk towards the stage but I suddenly realized something was lacking in my speech. Until then everything seemed fine but I started feeling like I was missing something, and I knew that it wasn’t the right time to add anything because mine was the first student speech. Walking up to the stage while listening to people cheering me on gave me a lot of confidence, but I also started feeling nervous. My dream of talking in front of 1000 people was about to come true, and I was thrilled.
Finally it was my turn. I started talking and people were cheering throughout the speech and I was enjoying that attention.The speech was coming to an end and I decided to add a line which was not in my speech, “Iron man might just love you 3000, but I love you infinity.” That line became the most emotional part of my speech, and as soon as it ended, I started walking towards my mom and dad. The happiness in my Mother’s face and the proud handshake from my Father, redefined my life. From a failure to the best student of Naperville North High School, this was the journey that made me reinvent myself again .